Top 7 Pros And Cons of Arranged Marriage That Can Help You Take A Wise Decision

Relationships By Sangati Jogwar May 10, 2021

In East Asia, choosing a spouse for a child has been the responsibility of the family. In an arranged marriage the entire process is conducted traditionally. The girl or a boy who is to be married many times does not have any say in the selection of his/her spouse.

Times are changing however now with many families giving freedom to their children to decide whether the arrangement of arranged marriage is acceptable to them or not. On the other hand, more couples are choosing to settle in love marriage. So what should you do? Can an arranged marriage give you the love of your life?

Here we are comparing the pros and cons of an arranged marriage which will definitely give you an insight into this type of marriage and help you take a wise decision:

Pros Of Arranged Marriage

1. You Get Support For Finding A Life Partner

Finding a life partner can be stressful for young people. Being friends with the members of the opposite sex comes causally but accepting someone for life is a crucial decision. When you are accepting an arranged marriage you have the support of your family members. More often two people with similar backgrounds, culture or ethnicities with a common ground are matched so that they do not face any problem adjusting after marriage.

2. Promise Of Better Future

During an arranged marriage all the practicalities such as the family background, salary, qualification, habits, and other things are taken into consideration. Families also cross-check the authenticity of the information provided to them which in itself is a promise of a better future. Unlike love marriage, where the bonding of two people is the priority, in arranged marriage, it is the security and probabilities of happiness that are taken into consideration while fixing a marriage.

3. Parents Involvement In Relationship

When individuals select their partners in such a relationship the family unit is just secondary. So naturally, the support from family members is also limited. However, as the cultural norms go, in an arranged marriage, both the sides of the parents feel equally involved and responsible for the outcome of that marriage.

Moreover, today’s arranged marriage also is quite open and give the couples enough opportunities to discuss their things and live the way they want. So today’s arranged marriage offer the couples best of both the worlds.

4. Exploring Each Makes Arranged Marriage An Adventure

Just as in love marriage knowing each other can be an advantage, similarly, in an arranged marriage not knowing each other can also be an advantage. Interestingly, as the couple explores each other, go through ups and downs initially; there is a strong possibility of falling in love that eventually leads to happy married life. The mystery also makes the overall journey of the couple more exciting.

5. Creates Harmonious Connection Between Families

Arranged marriages have approval of families from both sides. That is why it is quite easy to create a harmonious connection between these families who can come together during anniversaries, birthdays, and festival celebrations.

It not only improves the overall quality of life but ensures that the couple has strong support in terms of crisis.

6. Helps People To Keep In Touch With Their Culture & Ethics

Since an arranged marriage is accepted by everyone in the family and social circle it becomes quite easier to stay in touch with the culture and ethics. The couple is invited and welcomed in almost all the family and social celebrations.

They enjoy better cultural ties and even their children are well accepted in the social circle because of the backing from families on both the sides as well as social groups. This also gives more emotional stability and security to the people who opted for an arranged marriage.

7. Less Conflict In Terms Of Children

When the children come into the picture, a couple who had a love marriage and belong to different religion or culture can face several issues. For example, both families may have an objection to the way the children are being raised. Differences in spirituality, religion, discipline, and education can cause conflicts within the relationship and even can bust the base of a marriage.

On the other hand, an arranged marriage since has the blessings and approval of everyone, the children are saved from the negative impact of conflicting ideas.

Cons Of Arranged Marriage

1. Feeling Of Helplessness

It is not always that you immediately like a person chosen by your parents. Even though practically everything might seem all right, it takes a while for you to accept a complete stranger as a person. So when you opt for arranged marriage there is very little you can do about this situation.

Even though times are changing, more often arranged marriages are forced, especially in small towns and villages where it is the elders who decide the choice of the bridegroom. In such circumstances, a person’s life can become a misery.

2. Eliminates Phase Of Dating

Arranged marriages do not have a dating phase which is certainly a big disadvantage. Although in some countries, couples are allowed to meet each other prior to marriage, it is only after that the marriage is fixed can they go out. Moreover, the phase of meeting and mingling is very short which certainly cannot give you a good idea about your would-be-spouse.

One of the biggest reasons why parents in underdeveloped and developing countries force arranged marriage is because of financial insecurity.

3. Many Times Relationships Are Business Arrangements

When two influential families decide to tie the knot of their children, it is more because of financial benefits or business advantage. Of course, it does ensure the financial security of their children, but the basis is a business partnership wherein the plus and minus points or compatibility between the two people to be married is not given consideration.

It is also sometimes a matter of pride and legacy to get children married in a particular community or family which also sort of forces the would-be-couple to accommodate their personal preferences.

4. More Involvement Of Families And Relatives

In arranged marriages, more people are involved including relatives and families which sometimes make the couples feel alienated. More often, the couples getting married feel that it is not their wedding at all as others are more involved in deciding the important rituals, clothes, jewelry for the functions. One thing is for sure that a couple going into arranged marriage should be prepared for more unsettling experiences.

5. Chances Of Exploitation

Poor families without any standing in the society or in need of money may have to forcefully give a hand of their daughter in the family which is bad or corrupt for gaining wealth and status. Such forceful marriages are always doomed from the start and the girl can never find happiness with such a husband who can even exploit her in a wrong way.

6. Higher Incidences Of Divorce

Incidences of divorce are on the rise mostly because of non-compatibility between the two people. Arranged marriages do not give a couple enough time to know each other well and more often they are just mere acquaintances at the time of their wedding.

Once their married life begins, the true nature of both the girl and the boy comes to the fore and either one of them or even both of them may not find few things acceptable of the other leading to huge fights and divorce in the end.

7. Less Love More Practicality

An arranged marriage is based on practical aspects such as the educational qualification, looks, financial status, and earnings and so on. So at least at the start, there is no love. It takes time for the couple to develop a good bonding and eventually start loving each other. This might lead to partners feeling trapped in a love-less marriage.

You may like this